And I don’t always answer phone numbers unfamiliar phone numbers. Just too damn many solicitors in the world. And I don’t usually use the word “damn” either, but this call triggered my emotions.
“Are you alone?” It was MJ, my lawyer’s assistant.
“No, but I can be,” and I ducked into my office and closed the door.
“This is the call you’ve been waiting for,” she said, “to say that your marriage is terminated. You were officially divorced on July 23.”
The day before my 38th wedding anniversary. Or what would have been my 38th wedding anniversary. And even though I was expecting it—for weeks even—the news slammed into me like the death it is.
It’s coming. You know it’s coming. And yet bang, there it is. One day things in your life are this way. The next day things are that way.
I cried. Of course I did. You better believe it. And not just a little bit, just as I’m near crying now.
Not because divorce is the wrong thing.
But because, for me, divorce was the right thing. I never doubted that for a minute, even as I wished it weren’t so.
I’d thought a lot about what I was going to do when I got the news. A party felt unseemly. My sisters weren’t answering their phones. Folks had suggested champagne. But I’m not really a drinker.
A chocolate cupcake with milk sounded about right, equal measures celebration and consolation.
And not one of those mini-cupcakes either. This deserves a full-size chocolate cupcake with chocolate frosting.
So I went to Susie Cakes and that’s just what I had.
A funny choice maybe, but I’m also someone who knows my own self way better than she did a few years ago.
And a chocolate cupcake was what I needed.